Observations: Judging by Appearance

Is it wrong to judge people by their appearance?

When I am preparing for interview, I do what everyone else does.  I make sure my suit is clean and wrinkle-free, my hair is neat and tidy, I’ve researched the employer, etc.  Why? I do all of these things so that I make a great first impression.  I know the employers are going to judge me based on what I’m saying and equally, if not more importantly, my appearance.  We would all agree that in that situation, it’s okay for the employer to judge the new prospect.

Imagine instead if I came into that interview wearing the same suit jacket with a matching skirt, except my skirt was too small and too short and instead of wearing a blouse, I’m wearing a tank top that exposes most of my breasts.  with flip-flops on.  We already know I would not have gotten the job looking like such a hot mess.  I doubt my mother would have said:

“Oh baby that’s terrible!  How could they judge you by what you were wearing?  Shouldn’t they focus on how intelligent you are and not what you are wearing?”

She and my dad would have told me that my appearance for an interview sends non-verbal messages about my education, intelligence, socioeconomic status, and my desirability as a new employee.

Aka my appearance is a big deal.

You know the saying, “Don’t judge a book by its cover.”  I’m not so sure about that anymore.

95% of us do not go into Barnes & Noble or Borders or any large bookstore go to a certain section and start reading the first 3 chapters ALL the books we might be interested in.  Before you even reach for the book, the cover has most likely caught your attention.  You’re looking at the catchy titles, the glossy pictures, and the overall presentation of the covers.  Your critical thinking skills and good judgement are at work trying to decide which ones are worth your time and effort to pick up and briefly skim before purchasing.  It makes sense why people put a lot of thought (and $$) into the cover of their book, because they have mere seconds to convince the consumer to pick up their book.  They know you are more likely to pick up a bright and inviting cover and possible buy it so they will invest in the image they want to portray.

It’s similar to how the world works, whether we want to admit it or not.  First appearance can make or break you in many situations.  How someone dresses, speaks, carries themselves (posture, facial expression), even for a brief period, gives us a snapshot into the kind of person they are; whether you like it or not.It’s ‘faux pas’  now to say that your opinion about a person includes their overall presentation.  No one wants to appear like the bad guy, so of course they tell you they want to get to know you before they pass judgment, but I know better.

Is it a good use of my time and energy venting, complaining, and wallowing about how people shouldn’t judge me because I’m very overweight/obese, wear ill-fitting clothes, and use slang instead of proper English?  It would take less effort to invest my appearance than it would take choosing to pity myself and wish that the majority of society conform to my wishes.  Key word is choice.  You choose how you want to present yourself.  It is not out of your control to lose the extra pounds or pick flattering clothing to wear to work or social functions.

You did not come out of the womb as an obese infant wearing a Baby Phat tank top 2 sizes too small and Jlo jeans that barely cover your behind.  If you did, please leave your information under the Contacts link so we can discuss how to get your story on Dr. Phil.  I don’t want to hear people bring up race, gender,  birth deformities, etc.  Readers with common sense know that those things are out of your control and the things that are out of your control are not what this post is about.

This is all about not selling yourself short. Don’t sell yourself short.  You know you are capable of doing anything you put your mind and energy behind.  Why would you jeopardize your chances or put yourself at a disadvantage?  How could you be a willing participant in preventing people from getting to know lovely person  you are by not caring about your outer exterior?

What are your opinions on judging others by their appearance?  Do you have friends or relative who refuse to improve the way they look?  Do you think it’s only acceptable in certain situations or should we not do it at all? 

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